Stuck in the Middle

The hardest thing for me to decide on

Is a battle between my heart and mind.

I want to be in a relationship with him

But I can’t because I want her to be happy with him too.

Every day I see them both,

My heart and mind enter battle mode.

Do I want him to be happy or her to be happy?

I want them both to be happy…

Whenever I talk to either one,

I can feel either jealousy or love radiating off.

I wish that I could fulfil both of their wishes

But what about my happiness?

Well, that is long gone.

I don’t consider my happiness anymore.

I need to decide on how to make this work.

But I don’t want to lie to either.

I care about them both equally

And I could never do something that would hurt either

Despite all the guilt that plagues me each night.

One day I will have to choose

And I dread for when that day arrives.

I cannot face either of them

Because the idea of rejecting someone and hurting someone

Will be the death of me…